Ah Bo Dallas! What of ye fella? Perhaps the single most irritating human to ever grace this planet was the man to kick off NXT, with a wee promo backstage. I'm now absolutely convinced that the boy's gonnae turn heel soon enough, nae other explanation for him providing this unfathomable combination of Bo-Lievers patter, nicking Bret harts catchphrases, and smiling like he's just fulfilled his blood-lust for small children. He is thankfully interrupted by the prototype, Antonio Cesaro, who cuts a promo himself about how Bo has had everything handed to him, and the have a wee back and forth from there. Pretty solid start to the show, if only because it indicated Cesaro would get the chance to snap this cunts jaw later in the evening.
Paige vs Alicia Fox (NXT Divas Title Tournament Semi Final)
I could gush about how Paige is just the perfect female specimen aw day, but this match was actually very good, so I'll talk about that instead eh? Alicia Fox is a former Divas champion, but I never really rated her, so I was surprised by how good this was. Particularly in the middle, where both looked like they had the upper hand. Alicia hitting a perfect catch suplex, and Paige following up with a cracking jawbreaker (I'd gie her something to break her j...i mean eh? whit? wrestlin) The momentum shifted towards Paige for the final time though when she hit the Paige Turner to advance to the finals. Good wrestling and stauners aw round, whit could be better?
Conor O'Brien vs Nondescript English Jobber
I really cannae be bothered going back to find out his name, Andy something. It was a bit of a depressing squasher tbh. O'Brien is a beast but, and he can go. O'Brien wins.
Next up is a wee backstage segment with Corey Graves and Adrian Neville. Neither of them are great on the mic, but this is the only way ye get better eh? they aren't terrible either. They both plead with William Regal to stand with them against The Wyatt family, after their partner last week Kassius Ohno picked up an injury. I'm no mad at it, but definitely mic work to be done if these two are to go any further than low-mid card status on the main roster if they make it there atall.
Scott Dawson vs Xavier Woods
First I'd seen any of Xavier Woods, and he's quite a funny cunt. He comes out to some funky jam, and has a wee dance tae himself, why no eh? Enjoy yer life Xavier ma man. Ye've got a helluva fro, and a helluva positive wee attitude on the go, if I believed in god, I'd tell him tae bless yer soul.
Scott Dawson is usually one half of a tag team with some other redneck naecunt, but he gets a chance to shine a single this week. The match is awrite. Woods has an engaging, high octane style but the match is fairly even, until Woods hits the Lost In The Woods for the win.
Mason Ryan vs Enzo Amore...and then Colin Casady
I found this whole segment/double squash match super strange. Enzo comes out with Colin Casady and cuts a hilarious wee promo about how "SAWFT" Ryan is, only for their match to end in 5 seconds when Ryan clubs him with a big forearm. Then his pal Casady gets in, and considering he's 7 feet tall, it should be a better contest right? well no really. They got about a minute of awrite action, before Ryan pinned him anaw. Another main roster reject kinda killing my NXT buzz tbh.
Antonio Cesaro vs Boooo Dallas (NXT Title Match)
Even against this Salvatore Sincere lookin cunt, its still braw to see Cesaro in action. He had an absolute brammer of a match the last time I seen him on NXT vs Sami Zayn, and this would prove to be decent anaw. The match begins with loud chants of "no for Bo!" followed by even louder chants of "we the people" in favour of Cesaro. Considering how hard WWE have tried to bury him main roster wise, Cesaro is over as fuck and its braw to see. He spends much of the match basically ripping the utter shite out of Dallas, much to the delight of the crowd before Leo Kruger appears and does that weird leering thing he goes. Loitering with intent. Cesaro continues to impress and hits a stauner inducing fallaway slam intae a pin, but Dallas kicks out. He's holding his own though, give him his due, he's a decent wrestler and he is a big part of making this an extremely entertaining match. Hated the living fuck out of the finish though, Kruger jumps on the apron to distract Dallas, but instead he ends up getting in Cesaros way, and Dallas hits him with the fuckin armdrag thing, and gets the win. I realise the Cesaro winning that match wouldn't have made sense, but having him lose to that joke of a finisher after outclassing his opponent throughout is a fuckin farce.
Dallas celebrates, but Kruger jumps in and lays him erse ower ankles, only for Cesaro to intervene and tap his daft deranged jaw for him. Obviously unhappy with Krugers earlier involvement in costing him the match. Antonio then goes after Dallas, only for Dallas to find an annoying babyface second wind and fight back, and then Kruger jumps back in and suddenly its those two knocking Dallas' cunt in. Then the bold Sami Zayn comes out from the back to help Dallas oot, and its just a big messy brawl. All in all, a highly confusing way to end the night. Zayn and Dallas clear the ring, and then the credits roll, so that means its over eh? Aye I should think so.
Overall I'd say it was pretty good. Squash matches and the finish to the main event aside. An entertaining affair, and the Wyatt promo earlier in the night was another stone cold beezer. I give it 7 knife edge chops outta 11.
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